they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
