so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
