Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
