exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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