suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i just made my gag reflex go away.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
