i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
