i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
