I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
