i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
