It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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