Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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