I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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