He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
