So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
