I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
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