Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize