I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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