the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
He felt like a one man threesome
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
