Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
