Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
