do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
