He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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