I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
wow bdsm is so cute
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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