I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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