This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
