Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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