he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
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