Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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