Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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