Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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