She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
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