he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Randomize
