the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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