you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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