im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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