Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
