But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
