Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
pray to the hookup gods
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Randomize
