i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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