I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
My dad is sitting where you rode me
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
So. Much. Porn.
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