The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
