I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize