Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
So much rum. So many feels.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
