please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Randomize
