The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I think people are normalizing furries
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