he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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