He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
