it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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