You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
