So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize